Poetry

My Pain
Julie Sheffield

I look for you in my dreams Jamie, shouting you, crying out your name,
I can't hear your voice anymore, please talk to me once again,
I look everywhere for your smiling face, I know I'll never find you, I'm in the wrong place,
I dream of finding you one day, dreaming of you is the only way,
Dreams are all I've got, stop searcing for you, I will not.

I woke up one morning and four turned into three, no way, this isnt happening to me,
This isn't the way its meant to be, what has happened to my little family,
Just like that and you we're gone, disappeared, gone, just gone,
Life without you is to hard to face, where are you, you've left me no trace,
I don't know how I've lived and breathed without you being here,
I've only just existed, and now its been another year.

Facing everyday is a massive task, life without you feels like to much to ask,
I dont know how I'm surviving without you Jamie,
The pain, the pain, go's over and over, again and again,
Ripping at my heart is what I feel, smacks in the face,
Blows in the stomache, this pain is very real.

Life isn't fair as I now know,for this pain I know will never ever go,
Nothing can make this pain stop, thoughts and feelings of you are all I've got,
Dread, fear, loneliness the lot,
thoughts of you going around and round,
I wish I could curl up in a ball somewhere never to be found.

I can't go anywhere where your shoes may have trodden, too many memories,
where you have been, what you have done,
memories of you hurt, but will never be forgotten,
I can go places where your shoes never did tred
Theres no memories of you being there in my head.

Photo's of you are everywhere, but I can't look at you, its far to hard for me to bare,
I miss you so much, it hurts and hurts, I think of your funeral, on the way to the church,
It wasn't for your wedding day, that I will never see,
there will never be no bride-to-be,
Never again, never anymore, it stops right here for us, the family and me.

I'm devastated, my worlds fell apart, I'm now living with a hole in my broken heart,
I feel like an alien, living in civilian space, always a smile and a brave face,
It's always a show, of course people know,
This, me, I, that I carry, is now my shell, for now I have died inside too,
This life im now living, is now my pure hell.

Life go's on for other people, rushing around with their feet firmly on the ground,
To me its a big wide world out there, I hate it when they look or stare,
Feels like groundhog day,thats what it is,
everyday the same hurt and pain,
I'm stuck in this rut, and I can't get up.

I'll carry on dreaming,searching for you,
crying out your name, trying to find you everywhere,
I will look for you my beautiful son,
One day, Jamie,my baby, I will find you somewere in the big blue sky,
And then I will know, that we don't die,
Cuz, I've found your face, I've got to the right place.

When I've found you, I know that you'll be waiting for me at heavens gate
I can't believe I've found you, I feel great,
It's been a long time that I had to wait,
No-more heartache, no-more hurt and pain, it's over,
I've found you, we're together again, it's over,
I've got my boy, my pride and joy,
NO MORE PAIN.

My Soldier
Dedicated to my Daddy, the best father in the world
Kristie Barfield

His heart holds secrets,
I see it in his eyes.
Fighting a losing battle
but still he never cries.
A stronger soldier than I am
he fights this battle every day
Each morning he paints on his smile
and goes along his way.
He went into this battle
without a tear in his eye
and has made it this far in the war
and I've yet to see him cry.
This soldier gives me strength
when I see him I just know
he's not yet let go of life
he's helping me to grow
I know my soldier will not give up
although one day he knows he'll die
He's the strongest soldier that Ive met,
my daddy never cries.
Passed away he is now,
and I finally got to see
the day before he died
he broke down right in front of me.
The doctor had just left the room,
after telling us he will die
I do not want to leave my kids
is what he said that made him cry.

Allen's Poem
Mikayla Tanner

Allen made everyone smile when he was around.
Now, that he is gone there is a frown.
Now, that he is gone there is no turning around.
He is a soul lost not needing to be found.
I'm sending this message to you letting you know I still care,
But hoping you will be near.
You found happiness
But having to leave your home at least your not alone.
You took half of your family to your new home.

In Memory of Mum - Joan Jones
Died 15th April, 2005, Age 79
Submitted by Pat Hopkins, December 2005

My grief still swells up inside me,
like an overflowing well.
To no longer see your lovely face
Smiling at me is pure agony.
To no longer hear your gentle voice
Cuts me like a knife.

I sometimes feel the sun
Will never shine for me again,
Then it bursts through,
Just like your smile did,
And I can see the light again,
Just for a little while.

Our Dad - From My Heart
Written by Lesley McGregor
Gateshead, England

Here is a man who we will miss so dear
Remain in our hearts, but we wish he was here
The suffering the pain, not even time could heal
The pain in his heart was ever so real

To miss his wife, despite trouble and strife
Takes a man of courage whos heart had been cut with a knife

Although left on earth are his family and friends
When god has called his life must come to an end
He fought so hard and put up a fight
But at the end of the day he missed his wife

Now you're gone and we're still here
we’ll miss you both more each passing year

We hope you have both found peace in the place above
And god can continue to give you are love

Are hearts are heavy and filled with pain
We all know life will never be the same

To help us get through this hurtful time
Please continue your love to help us shine

Now are final words to you both
Please care for each other, because all we have left is hope

We will love and miss you both
Forever in our hearts Your Daughters and Son xx

Good Bye
Submitted by: Steven

I know my time has ended,
Its time for me to leave.
I want you all to know,
You mean so much to me.
Why I had to go,
Was a mystery to me.
All I heard was God,
Saying “ Please come home to me.”
So I left my friends and family,
I didn’t say goodbye.
All I got to see,
Were the tears in their eyes.
But as I saw them crying,
I asked them not to grieve.
Knowing how much we care,
That our love will never cease.
You can look up at the sky,
And look over to the sea.
When you feel that gentle breeze,
You always think of me.
Now your time has come,
To join me up above.
So now were reunited,
And still, we have our love.

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